Thoughts
by Angelic Devil217
Summary: **SPOILER ALERT OotP** Remus Lupin. Alone. Thinking. Really bad summary. Sorry, not good at these. It's about love though. Kinda angsty, but fluffy and well it's Remus, isn't he just the best character ever?


A/N Hi gonna warn again, cuz I was told who died before I read the end and I was miffed, so if you don't wanna know don't read, this story contains spoilers! Okay? Alright.

Disclaimer – Okay I own nowt but the plot, anything you don't recognize and Drusilla Black (She is _not actually on the Black Family Tapestry_ I made her up for the purpose of this story)

Thoughts

Remus Lupin gently brushed his fingertips over the burnt patch on the Black Family Tapestry in the Drawing room between the place Andromeda should've been and Narcissa and Bellatrix Black.

The gold thread beneath it was charred but still intact, it claimed the person whose name should've been there to be only thirty-five years old. The date of death told Remus the person had died fifteen years ago.

 He could still imagine the gold thread that would've spelt her name.

_Drusilla Tawny Black._

Remus sighed. Drusilla had been a year younger than the Marauders; she'd been a Gryffindor (much to her fathers displeasure and Narcy's embarrassment) and a member of the Order of the Phoenix. 

 Which was why, of course, her name like Sirius' and Andromeda's and Tonks' was burnt away.

 Fairly close to her death though.

 Remus remembered the day the Black family discovered Drusilla was a spy for the Order. Angry didn't cover it. Shamed. Livid. Incensed. Mortified. Furious. Amongst others.

 Remus smiled sadly. She hadn't cried not then, she liked her family about as much as Sirius did. But later when her mother said the things she did - Just like Sirius's mother Rhapsody Black was not a nice person – Drusilla had cried. Only Remus knew that.

He also knew even if they hadn't burnt her name away, they'd never have added the golden thread they had when Narcissa married Lucious, to read Remus Lupin. Not ever.

 But then Drusilla and Remus never made it to the Altar they never were married.

 He asked her and she said yes. He remembered that clearly, remembered the way her amber eyes glowed almost in the candlelight, they'd been at the headquarters of the Order back then which had been a lot smaller, a Hall in a small village named Polesworth in the Midlands. 

**Flashback**

It had rained all day, it was still raining now although lighter and now the thunderstorm that had been threatening all day had broke and silver fork lightening split the sky as a young sandy haired Remus Lupin glanced up and spotted Drusilla Black heading his way.

 He smiled and laid the parchment he'd been reading onto the tabletop, "Hey" He smiled softly.

 She smiled back and perched on the edge of the table, biting her lip. Remus marvelled inwardly at the way the moonlight made her blonde streaked tawny hair shine, the lightening accentuating the blonde each time it blazed across the sky. He watched her eyes dart everywhere but at his face. She focused for some time on the large dream catcher above the door, her eyebrows furrowed over her small nose.

 "Remus…" She began uncertainly. 

 "Dru…" He started at the same time.

 There was an uncomfortable silence. He watched her nervously rub her knee, the knee her big sister Narcy had once taken a large brick too when Drusilla was eight years old and Narcy thirteen so Narcy could see what would happen. 

 Drusilla was wearing a too-big white button down shirt and form-fitting light blue jeans; her hair was tied up at the back, only wispy strands reaching her face. Remus was sporting similarly muggle clothes, a black T-shirt underneath a blue denim jacket and black slacks, his own hair was unstyled and unruly, a golden brown mop as Sirius referred to it.

 Drusilla suddenly scrunched her eyes up and said in a rush, "Look Re, Sirius told me you wanted to talk and if this is one of those **talks** you know where you tell me it's over and try to be nice about it, so I don't cause a scene or tell Sirius you're a complete bastard then I'm not interested, you could just nod and I'll-"

 Remus's eyes widened and he stood abruptly catching her off guard. He gently cupped her face in his hand and kissed her tenderly. "Dru, stop. I said I wanted to talk to you, but it's a 'will-you marry-me?' sort of talk." He told her in a hushed tone.

 She turned watery eyes up to his, It-it is?" She asked hopefully.

 "Yeah." He reiterated, lowering himself onto one knee, he kept a hold of her hand and gazed into her eyes.

 "Drusilla Tawny Black, will you marry me?"

**End Flashback**

She'd said yes, jumping into his arms and hugging him tight enough to almost hurt and he laughed with her.

 It was only a month later she was killed.

 Sirius had told him, tears in his own eyes.

 Sirius told him it had been Death eaters and Harriet and Graham Peasgood and Dolphus Cerrywell had been killed too. This was a week before Lily and James were found dead at Godrics Hollow and Peter was said to have been killed by Sirius along with twelve muggles on a crowded London street. And Harry Potter saved the world for the first time.

 Remus sighed as he pulled his hand away from the tapestry.

 What sense did it make to dwell on the past? He'd never seen Drusilla's body, he'd attended the memorial with Dumbledore and Andromeda at his side, Narcissa had never been there and by that point Bellatrix was already in the bowls of Azkaban. Whilst most of the world was fixated by the Black trial, Sirius eclipsed Drusilla's death. And Remus never once went to one of his best friends hearings, knowing he'd only see the face of a murderer not the face of Padfoot his fellow Marauder, only the killer of James and Lily Potter, Harriet and Graham Peasgood, Dolphus Cerrywell, Drusilla Black and countless others.

 Remus shook his head violently sending the golden-brown and grey mane into disarray, he himself was only thirty-six years old, a werewolf and best friend to a redeemed – _dead _– man named Sirius Black.

 Being the only true Marauder left – Remus no longer considered Wormtail as Peter Pettigrew, the somewhat shy boy he grew up with – was never easy. Now he had the Order to occupy his time though, Harry's well being - another thing forefront in his mind and dealing with the Ministry. 

 And yet his thoughts would invariably turn to Drusilla at any given time. 

A/N I know it's short, at the moment it's just a ficlet, I do have a longer plot in mind and well I like it – but that doesn't account for much does it? So if you wanna see if that plot could be any good just review kay?

Love 'n' Stuff

Angelic Devil


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